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Author Topic: Charles & Diana Parenting style  (Read 6186 times)
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sandy
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« Reply #20 on: January 03, 2014, 06:35:13 pm »

I think if Charles was not so "precious" and felt he was entitled to a mistress and wanted the marriage HIS way, things would have worked out better. He was not acting like a grown up himself and his Dimbleby book was a compilation of Poor Me.

If he made a sincere effort and worked hard on the marriage to Diana (who came into it with no baggage), I think it would have worked out. It's like if the Duke of Windsor wanted it all and kept Wallis in his life and married Lady X to give him his heirs, it would have been just as much of a mess. Wallis would not go away and Edward had this dependence on her. Same with Charles. Charles should have gotten straightened out before he even thought of marrying. Go for counseling, drop Camilla, get a moral compass.

Diana became very bitter and upset and I don't blame her. She also could not just leave Charles after the marriage since they were senior royals.

I think once Charles decided to keep on Camilla the marriage was doomed or at least had a shaky foundation. To really be good parents the two should have worked on parenting the children to the very best of their abilities.  If Charles had been given a choice Camilla or the throne maybe he would have awakened from his obsession with Camilla.

The boys needed two parents who put them first. Without Camillla around I don't think Diana would have strayed.
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RoyalWatcher
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« Reply #21 on: January 03, 2014, 07:45:01 pm »

HM had the opportunity to make chuck choose between the throne and camz........she didn't.  She stayed with a man who had numerous affairs during her marriage-I'd have divorced him for adultery and banned him from seeing his kids, but she didn't.

HM has no backbone.  And never will.    doesn't mean that she doesn't love her family, but she's not going to confront something that leaves ill will.
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sandy
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« Reply #22 on: January 04, 2014, 01:43:54 am »

Exactly; Diana was busy with her bulimia, Andrew Morton and Charles was busy with self pity and Camilla.

Which came first the chicken or the egg? Without Camilla, Diana's bulimia would not have intensified it is brought on by stress. And Diana was not "busy" with bulimia, she had an eating disorder. Diana was an excellent mother and she loved the boys and Charles did too.
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Kuei Fei
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« Reply #23 on: January 04, 2014, 02:35:55 am »

It's not something she could help, but no matter how it started, the way it played out doesn't excuse the fact that Diana was the one who inadvertently brought Harry's legitimacy into question vi Martin Bashir.
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« Reply #24 on: January 04, 2014, 07:26:04 am »

I remember a video when Prince Charles told Princess Diana not to have Prince William till after his polo game...seriously riding horses and batting balls around was more important thumbsdown

I am a mother who has recovered from an eating disorder but...I was always there for my child thank god I grew up enough to be healthy for my other 2 children several  years later...even if Princess Diana was dealing with this I do not think she was to "busy with it" nor that her boys suffered very much from it....what they did suffer from was the lack of attention given to them from their father...he was too busy making sure he could get his milk and cookies with his Mistress.

Diana Died at an early age so she really didn't get a chance to help raise her sons all the way.....was unfair to her boys but life goes on...the way the boys turned out I put that on Prince Charles....and his Mistress slash wife

I also think that Prince William and Harry hatred for the paps and the press rests on there father as well not just with Diana..... remembered a quote given by Prince Charles saying "what an insufferable man" when giving an interview...so that's telling his boys that the press are a pain in his a*s. JMO
« Last Edit: January 04, 2014, 07:31:00 am by Nighthawk » Logged
Stephanie
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« Reply #25 on: January 04, 2014, 11:23:21 am »

I wonder how Camzilla influenced Chuck in his parenting after Diana died.
She had to ward off Chuck's guilt and remorse and worries from herself and remain the number one in the food chain.
Maybe she gradually managed to have him see his own flesh and blood as the relics of a broke marriage to"unstable" Diana and thus more or less worthless.
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cate1949
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« Reply #26 on: January 04, 2014, 07:54:26 pm »

there is I think a very telling moment in the video of Diana's funeral - it is at the end as Diana's coffin is being loaded into the hearse - the boys are standing there with their father and uncle and the whole time Charles is watching Harry - moving closer to him - shows he was concerned about Harry - at one point - Charles lifts his arm as if to put it on Harry - and his arm sort of hovers in the vicinity of Harry's shoulders - but Charles then pulls back.

I think Charles is also a victim of his stiff upper lip show no emotion upbringing too - so much so that despite his instinct - he still could not bring himself to hug his distraught child - it is an especially sad moment to me -

I think Will is like his father in that respect - keep it all inside - don't show your emotions

I think Charles was a concerned father - his failure was that he was too permissive - did not know how to set limits for them.  Diana clearly - you can see over and over again in films - she did set limits around their public behavior and she tried to prepare them for the experiences they would have - the story of her in the weeks before that trip to Australia when William was still an infant - how she would click the camera around him while at home so he would get used to the sound of the cameras and would not be frightened.  That is a mother who is thinking about her kids and being protective.  But then later she pulls that whole stunt with William before the Panorama interview - it is as if all that good parenting instinct disappeared once the two of them became embroiled in the divorce wars.
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Spice
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« Reply #27 on: January 04, 2014, 08:11:36 pm »

^Although PC could have been thinking, I want to put my arm around him but if I do the cameras will zoom in and it will become a dominating image of the news coverage, plus it might make Harry cry when the cameras are on him. IIRC, the cameras were not allowed to cover the boys during the funeral, and they only had to hold it together during the walk and that part at the end.  Most people lose control of their emotions when they are watching the coffin go into the car.  They would have discussed beforehand that they didn't want to be filmed crying their eyes out... it doesn't mean they showed no emotion, especially when the cameras were off them during the service.
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cate1949
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« Reply #28 on: January 04, 2014, 08:27:24 pm »

^you are right Spice - it could also have been that - which is even sadder in that - he could not comfort his child because of the ever present press coverage of their lives.  Which goes I think to part of the problem with their childhood - PC and his siblings were not exposed to so much intrusion by the press growing up - it was much more controlled.  W and H grew up with the constant never ending presence of the paparazzi.  That has to screw you up.
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« Reply #29 on: January 04, 2014, 08:32:07 pm »

Indeed,  Cate.  And I think George will grow up with even more press scrutiny than W&H had.  Still, it's easy for the royals to cross the line into self-pity about it and blame press intrusion for absolutely everything, like "poor innocent Waity should be able to sunbathe in view of a public road without being invaded by cameras".
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sandy
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« Reply #30 on: January 05, 2014, 12:00:18 am »

It's not something she could help, but no matter how it started, the way it played out doesn't excuse the fact that Diana was the one who inadvertently brought Harry's legitimacy into question vi Martin Bashir.

Diana did not bring Harry's legitimacy into question. Charles, hewitt and Diana ALL indicated that the marriage irretrievably broke down in 1986. Charles went to Camilla and Diana went to Hewitt. Hewitt several times said Harry was two when the affair with Diana started. Diana indicated the same thing.

Blame Hewitt for this. He was the one to go on TV after Diana died (after innumerable interviews saying he was not Harry's father) "under Hypnosis" and said "maybe" he and Diana started earlier. Ironically this confession (which no doubt earned him a tidy sum--he needed money) does call also into question Will's legitimacy.

I am not getting why Diana is blamed.

Charles dumped her like a peach pit and Diana sought comfort elsewhere.. Diana's issue IMO was getting interested in the wrong sort of man. Charles for one and Hewitt for turning into such a sleaze for the almighty $$$$. He sold his soul going on TV during the "hypnosis" interview and he is still broke and living with his Mum now.

Charles should have put a lid on his minions trashing his sons' mother--all to get the mistress "accepted." I have no respect for him. His rejecting Diana set up this tragic chain of events.

I'll always believe Diana confessed because she knew Hewitt could publish the letters she sent him so IMO it was a pre emptive strike.

hewitt made the mess not Diana with his "hypnosis" confession.
« Last Edit: January 05, 2014, 12:06:25 am by sandy » Logged
discoveryme
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« Reply #31 on: January 05, 2014, 01:17:18 am »

This is not Charles and Diana's thread and this topic should be removed by the Administrator...it is innapropriate, Charles and Diana's parenting have NOTHING to do with Charles and Camilla's section.
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sandy
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« Reply #32 on: January 05, 2014, 01:25:19 am »

I was answering another poster. Am I not allowed to do this by your "rules"?

It says Charles and Diana's parenting style. Of course the marital difficulties are quite relevant. The boys had divorced parents and Dad married the other woman--this is their background, like it or not.

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YooperModerator
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« Reply #33 on: January 05, 2014, 01:37:46 am »

Well I can't exactly split it up between Charles and Diana board. (it's not part of the divorce deal. imo tehe)
And since Charles is the one who's still alive I think that it's good here.
But officially Harry's parent's were Diana and Charles, I hope that ends this whole Hewitt mess because that part is off topic in this parenting topic...
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discoveryme
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« Reply #34 on: January 05, 2014, 01:38:59 am »

This belongs to Diana's section which she has. this is CHARLES AND CAMILLAS SECTION, not Charles and Diana, you can ask administrators to created their or make one if you WANT, but not on Charles and Camilla's section.

Alexandrine or other administrators please remove these irrevelent post which doesn't belong here.
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discoveryme
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« Reply #35 on: January 05, 2014, 01:44:23 am »

Akasha I understand what you're saying, however why is this the first topic of Charles and Camilla, it shouldn't be posted at this part if there is a discussion , it should be removed to the bottom them.
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sandy
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« Reply #36 on: January 05, 2014, 01:45:18 am »

William seems to want to do things "his way" as a parent. And supposedly is more "modern" but he tries to forget that his son is a future King of England and he needs to think in terms of his royal heritage instead of shielding him from any public attention (even limiting photo ops or release of photos). I think in many ways even thought they divorced, Charles and Diana realized strongly that their children are royals and William a future King. And they did not have the cameras constantly on the children but at the same time released periodic photo ops so the heir and spare could be seen by the public. And William's grandparents, great grandparents and great grandparents released photos of heirs and other royal children. william IMO seems to be skewing Diana's message that he should see how the other half lives to mean he is "average" and should avoid being seen as much as possible. I think had Diana lived, having the two parents around would have been better for their well being and upbringing.
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« Reply #37 on: January 05, 2014, 02:11:32 am »

I made the topic non sticky which means that once you stop posting it'll move down the list when newer topic's pop up.
It's up to you now to make this a lasting or a slipping subject.

Frankly I don't like to discuss parenting styles because it's rather touchy.
No parent is perfect but they weren't the worst parents of the decade either.
Could they have done better? perhaps.
But if I were in their shoes would I have done better? I don't know
Hindsights 20/20 ya know, we gotta play with the cards we're dealt even if it's not the best hand. sigh
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sandy
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« Reply #38 on: January 05, 2014, 02:14:22 am »

I think that ultimately it is up to the children to make their own way and not blame parents for bad decisions they make. William and Harry are ultimately responsible for their good or bad choices.
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Spice
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« Reply #39 on: January 05, 2014, 08:07:10 am »

^Good point, Sandy.  They'll  soon be middle aged, its about time William stopped playing the Diana card.
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